Today’s prompt:
What are 3 of your legitimate fears and why.
Well, I seem to have a lot of fears now that I stopped to think about it. They use word legitimate in the prompt- Like what the heck, who are they to say what is legitimate or not!! LOL. Anyways, rant over, here are my fears, and YES they are all legitimate to me!! The first 2 are pretty generic, the third is raw and is me. It deals with death.
Bats
I know they are useful. I know that help with the mosquitoes and other little creepies- they still scare me to tears. I know many will say this is not a legitimate fear – it’s silly to fear such a tiny little thing. All I can think of is my long hair and one of them flying little jeezers flying at me AND it getting tangled in my hair.
What would I do then I’d be a mess. I’d be freaking and running and screaming and crying at the wait on my arms it would just be a scene. And that will just make you look even more stuck in my hair I remember we were camping at a cottage in Nova Scotia nearest back and I woke in the morning and we were getting ready to go and something was flying around inside the cabin. Deep down inside I knew it was a bat but I kept telling myself it was just a bird. I made my husband up the time pack everything up as I could soon to myself saying the blankets and would not move until he was packed and I could sneak out still wrapped in the blankets into the car. Yes, that’s a bit extreme but I was petrified. Anyways I survived that made it to the car safe and sound. There are many instances where I am scared. My kids get a great kick out of it, literally, we can be sitting around a campfire and if a bat comes by I will either go back inside or if I’m too scared to do that, I hope to have a hoodie on and I tie that hoodie so tight around my head. There’s no way that bat can get to my hair and I sit there in tears until I can get to a safe place. And of course, this makes them laugh even harder got to love the support of my children.
Hiding from bats?
Snakes
I know many people love them. I am not one of those people. I don’t care if they’re big or small, white, brown, green, black, purple, a gummy snake, ok well maybe not gummy snakes! I don’t care what color the snake is, a snake is a snake. It needs to stay at least a good fifty feet away from me. Which is kind of odd because I’m a country girl that hates city living. This means that I quite often will encounter little garden snakes. Anybody in the vicinity of me will know but I have seen a snake because I squeal like a baby and I freaked out and run.
Fear of my children dying
I know that everybody dies at some point in time. I think this fear comes from the fact I’ve already had to bury one of my children. (You can read Claudia’s story here) It’s a struggle every day to not let this fear completely control me. I have been a super protective mom and it’s just been the last little while I’ve been able to get a little better grasp on this fear. Now, don’t get me wrong, the fear is still there. I still get an ache in my heart – my gut just aches from time to time. It really is a crazy thing to fear but it is my fear. My children are getting older my youngest is 16 and it really does take a lot of time and energy to keep the fear at bay. To keep my mind from wandering to the doom and gloom, to just accept life. Even just writing this I am feeling very uneasy. I know that my kids are smart. I’ve raised them well and I really can’t let this fear control me. I think perhaps being an empath comes into play with this fear as well. My heart aches when I hear of parents losing a child. I can relate to that pain they are experiencing. I guess that is where the fear kind of comes in. I know the pain, it scares the crap out of me. This past weekend here in PEI we learned of a young child and his father, losing their lives in a tragic accident. It has really pulled at my heartstrings and my heart goes out to the family. I also need to mention the families in Miramichi, who lost their children this weekend in an awful accident. Four teenagers lost their lives in a vehicle accident, the same age as youngest daughter. These families are living my worst fear.
It really makes us stop and look at life, it can be over in an instant.
So despite my fears, and your own fears too, as big or as small as they may be, it is important to focus on having a realistic mind when dealing with our fears. Let us not be afraid to live while we are still able too!
Sorry for totally changing the mood of this post, I could have kept it light and silly, but my heart is not there right now. This blog is about me, me being raw, real, and not sugarcoating things. I say it like it is, sharing the raw, real me, on this blog -that seems to be what people like!
Please take care of yourself, don’t let your fears run your life. Do what makes you smile, do what makes you happy. Do whatever it takes, day after day, to learn to keep whatever you fear from controlling your days.
In memory of Josh Underhay and his son, Oliver April 2019
In memory of Cassie,Emma,Logan and Avery April 2019
Until next time my friends, be kind to yourself and look out for others! xo
